I wanna have a father; but, I am not sufficient enough to be accepted by a father in my society. I wanna have a PhD; but, I am not sufficient enough to be accepted by a university and professors in my society. I wanna have an employee; but, I am not sufficient enough to be accepted by an employee in my society. I love listening to music, watching movies, reading books, education, having a PhD and ...; but now and after a period of punishment and disappointment, I am looking for a device for commit suicide easily and without pain.