Sharing your postal address
Whenever you feel ready to share your postal address with a penpal, it is easy to do — and your address stays hidden until they say yes.
🔒 Trust not yet established — do not type contact details
The envelope icon sits inside the message box, in the bottom left corner — under where you type, opposite the send button. That is the share button.
How it works
- Save your address first. Before the envelope will
work, you need your address registered with the site — add it
once under My Postal
Address in the Snail Mail menu. Write it just as it would appear
on an envelope: your full name on the top line, then street, town
and postcode. Your country is added for you.
You only ever do this once. The same saved address is used everywhere you choose to share it, and you can edit it at any time.
- Press the envelope in your conversation. Open the conversation with your penpal and click the envelope icon in the bottom left corner of the message box. You will be asked to confirm.
- Your penpal is asked whether they would like it. They see that you would like to share your address — but the address itself stays hidden until they accept. An offer lasts 3 days, then quietly lapses.
- Once accepted, it is theirs to write to. Your address appears in the conversation laid out ready for the envelope, and it is saved into their Address Book so it is never lost in an old message. When they share theirs back, it lands in yours the same way.
If the envelope icon is greyed out
The icon stays visible but goes grey when something is not ready yet. Hover over it — or tap it — and it will tell you which one of these it is:
- You have not saved an address yet Add one under My Postal Address and the icon becomes active straight away.
- It is still early in the conversation You and your penpal each need to have written at least twice before an address can move. It gives you both a chance to get to know one another first.
- Your penpal is not seeking addresses right now Every member can decide, per conversation, whether they want to be offered an address at all. If they would rather not, the icon greys out — keep writing and try again in a few days.
- You have already offered One offer at a time per penpal. They have three days to accept.
- They already have your address Nothing more to do — go and write that letter.
Please do not type your address into a message. While you are still building trust in a conversation, typed contact details — postal addresses included — are removed automatically and may lead to a warning. The envelope button in the corner of the box exists so you can swap addresses properly instead.
It is also safer for you: a typed address goes out whether or not the other person wanted it, and it is gone the moment the conversation scrolls away.
You are always in control
Nothing is shared without your say-so. Your address is only ever sent when you press the envelope and confirm it.
You can stop offers before they start. At the top of any conversation there is a switch — Allow this penpal to offer you their postal address. Turn it off and they cannot offer, and they are not told.
Declining is private. If you decline an offer, the other person is never told why. They simply see that the button is not available.
You can take it back. An address you have shared can be removed from a conversation at any time with Remove my address on the card.
Change of address? Update it once under My Postal Address and the penpals you have already shared it with see the new one in place.
How many addresses can I share?
While you are still building trust with someone, there is a gentle monthly limit on brand-new address exchanges: 2 new penpals a month for free members and 5 for Premium members. Once trust is established in a conversation, there is no limit at all.
The limit counts new exchanges in a rolling 30 days, in either direction — offering costs nothing until your penpal actually accepts.